Alas I have no photos since I was working the thing(and I forgot the memory card for my camera).

Report will come as soon as I get my head screwed back on right.

Well, I posted a short report one place already and got a severe smackdown and I'm not looking to get my ass handed to me, so I'm afraid I can't post a con report. Sorry.

you don't have to worry about getting smacked down here, wolfie...tell us your con tales!!

Oh yeah, that sucks, wolfe.

We are always VERY appreciative of con reports around here.

Friendliest place in the Xenaverse, so post away!

Yeah! Help a sista out! For those that didn't go.

The smackdown came from a Creation employee(Lucy and Renee's professional stalker) so
even though I didn't post anything that anyone else at the convention didn't see or couldn't figure out if they've completed 2nd grade, because I volunteered, I was posting "backstage info".

I'll see if I can pare it down to the bare minimum, which hopefully will be safe.

Oh, jeez! We are all human beings. Maybe they didn't get the memo to act like one. Not everyone has the money to drive half way across the US to see these people. The least they could do is tell us about it. It's over. It's not like your letting out surprises. Anything you're able to tell us would be lovely. Thanks, Wolfe.

Heh heh! "Professional stalker."

That's now my new nickname for Sharon Who?

Hehe...that thought has crossed my mind on more than one occasion.

OK, I've left this in somewhat it's entirety, and just put CENSORED where anything that could possibly be scrutinized was.
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I'm going to preface this by saying I was working the con and so couldn't pay as much attention to the talent as I would have liked, and, of course, I didn't have the opportunity to take notes so I've forgotten a lot.

Friday
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Got out of bed at 4:50AM to get ready for the drive to Burbank.(Note: I had not slept at all) Woke my friends up so we could be out of the house by 6AM.

Drive. Drive. Drive.

Arrive and report for duty at around 10:15. Check into hotel and dump my stuff in the room before rushing to get the details of my work assignment. Turns out I'm working CENSORED and it's just going to be the two of us for the whole thing all day. Spend the next half hour or so making some last minute set-up in the auditorium while Jennifer Ward-Leland and Michael Hurst practice for the Cabaret that night. Oh. my. Goddess. Jennifer's voice is INCREDIBLE!!! And she's so much more attractive in person than she was as Boudicea. CENSORED, then it's time to let everyone in.

A bit later, Adrienne Wilkinson comes on and talked about her audition for the character "Empress of Rome" and a few other things(that I can't really remember). Goes on to mention she had seen "Into the Woods" and was absolutely blown away by how good the witch was(who was played by Jennifer Ward-Leland). Micheal Hurst happened to be directing the episode Adrienne was filming the next day while she gushed about the witch and he puffed up
with pride at hearing her praise of his wife. She talked about her time on ER and touched on her career a little more.

A half hour later David Franklin came on and a few people poked fun at his height. He talked about his costume and how grateful he was to the stunt people for making him look good. He talked about the filming of Xena dragging him through the dirt behind her horse and how he had to do the stunt himself. A couple people brought up Farscape and he touched on his
experience with Farscape and how the Farscape people had to call him at home and ask him to bring his costume's underwear back.

Tsianina Joelson. She's ummmm, well, she came across as quite ditzy actually yet intelligent. She talked about her incredible shrinking loincloth, her backround in dance and as a fitness person, and she talked about being a mother and how she's finally getting back into exercise. She mentioned a movie she was in where the back of her pants ripped in the
middle of a shot and how it ripped again while they reshot the scene. She also spoke about some of the stunt work she did herself on Xena and how she regretted agreeing to some of it. The crowd sang her happy birthday because
her birthday is Jan 16th. At the request of audience members she did a high kick and then it was time for her to leave the stage.

Tim Thomerson came on. He had a bit of a foul mouth and acted a little drunk, but that may just be him. He talked about acting as a job and how he was annoyed at these big actors talking about "their art" and they should
just "hit their mark, get their paycheck, and go home." When asked about what else he had done, he told people to go to IMDB if they had a spare day. He talked about his time in the military and how he had gotten into acting
and instructed the audience on how to act drunk.

After that it was autograph set-up time and I got the job of punching people's tickets. If I hear the words "it's so small!" again, I may kill someone. People had been complaining about CENSORED so Creation got CENSORED and all people could talk about was how small the hole was. On a high note I got to meet CENSORED from the CENSORED list. I finally got off
duty at about 8:30 and went with my roommates to the Daily Grill for dinner. This was the only proper meal I had all weekend. The entire rest of the weekend I was running on alcohol, apples, pumpkin bread, pretzels, and some
leftovers from the Sunday brunch.

Anyways, after dinner, the Cabaret was still going on so the bar was pretty empty. We played a couple rounds of pool and then I started drinking wine and making friends with people who were coming out of the cabaret. Oh, and note for future attendees, the cute bartender chick answers quickest to
"Sweetie darling." I met up with some Texans and we saluted the Longhorns defeat of USC. I had been dragged into their group because one of them(CENSORED from the CENSORED videos) thought I looked like a friend of theirs. Then the bartender said those two words that I haven't heard since moving to Nevada: "Last Call!" So, we got shoed out and a bunch of us stayed in the lobby for a little while longer. Finally the booze and not sleeping for 44 hours finally caught up with me and it was time for bed.

Saturday
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Got up at 8:15 with a bit of a hangover and got ready before reporting for duty at 9:30. My assignment was again CENSORED, but thankfully
CENSORED. We ran through CENSORED while Hudson's yoga class was on(CENSORED).

Then it was time to open the doors and shortly thereafter Steven Sears came on. He was around so much that weekend, I honestly can't remember what, specifically, he talked about at his panel. He did talk about how great it was that the fans were so accepting of each other, be they straight people focused on the maintext or members of the GLBT community who focused on the subtext.

A short while later Katherine Fugate was on and gave a very detailed synopsis of the situation with the Xena movie and told the fans about a
letter writing campaign in regards to getting the budget for the movie approved by the studio. More information is available on her website.

Unfortunately, my hangover combined with the pounding music from the music videos finally drove me CENSORED so I took over CENSORED and missed most of Jennifer and Michael's panels. I do remember he performed some Shakespeare at the end.

After that was intermission and an auction so CENSORED all took a break before CENSORED.

Renee is the thinest pregnant woman I've ever seen, she carries everything in front so when you looked at her straight on you could barely tell she was pregnant. She talked about her recent trip to the middle east and a few
blessing boxes she bought. She showed her artwork, including a few nude self portraits that were still in progress. Honestly, I found her whole thing mindnumbingly boring. It was overly philosophical and introspective and was all about high-brow emotional intellectualism. The highlight of her panel was the CENSORED who looked absolutely adorable. Sorry Renee fans, I just zoned her out.

I missed most of the costume contest, although I did see the Callisto chick, the little girl Xena, Najara, and someone who kept ripping open her shirt and pushing her boobs forward(I think it was CENSORED) on the stage while I headed to the CENSORED for my next assignment.

I was assigned as the feeder for Jennifer Ward-Leland. Everyone who spoke with her mentioned what a great voice she had and how much prettier she was than the pictures of Boudiccea led you to believe. I spent a good deal of
the time trying to convince her to release a CD for next years convention. Enough other people loved the idea that I'm hopeful. Did I mention how absolutely increadible a singer she is? Anyways, next year if she's invited back, she'll bring a gold dress to match the silver one she wore at the cabaret this year. Everything about her is very elegant. She remembered everyone she spoke to last year and she made sure she spoke to everyone in
the line. Out of the hundreds of people she remembered, she only made three mistakes. Eventually Katherine and Steven were slowing the line to the point where we were all going to be late to the dessert party so Jennifer
and Michael were asked to walk the line and finish doing their autographs so they could be rushed to the party. I grabbed a nearby refuse tray that was clear and became their moving table so they had something solid to do the
autographs on. They still made a point of trying to say hello to everyone in the line.

Finally we made it to the dessert party and I CENSORED Tim Thomerson's CENSORED. Unfortunately he had to leave very early but I managed to convince him to do one extra table(Xenopoly people, that was you) and then he was gone. I was released from "active duty" and I quickly scarfed down a bowl of ice cream and ran up to the room to change really quickly and
ran back. The party was a lot of fun! Good company, lots of good photographers who will be e-mailing me pictures. Victoria Pratt stopped by the table I settled at and I played lust-struck fangirl for a couple minutes. Le drool. Congrats to Beth for using her hurt leg to get Victoria to sit in her lap. I was CENSORED. I finally managed to find Val while she was discussing something with Victoria Pratt and CENSORED and then she asked me to look for TJ Scott. I, stupidly, asked "Who's that?" and Victoria started laughing, suffice to say I didn't end up looking for him. Steven
Sears stopped by the table and we convinced him to take off his signature fedora for a couple pictures and he told us the story behind the hat. Apparently he'd been trying it on in a hat store and someone passing by told him "Nice hat," he continued trying it on a little while longer and three more people told him "Nice hat" so he figured he should get it
because he realized he had the face for a fedora. Dancing started up and Valerie tried to order me onto the dance floor, but I convinced her that it wouldn't be a good idea to have as bad a dancer as me around while she's already got a hurt leg. Shortly before people started drifting to the bar I got a Lucy Lawless ribbon. Thank you! About midnight the bulk of us shifted to the bar and continued to party. Several people asked me about one of my fellow volunteers, CENSORED. Sorry girls, she's straight. The people I passed the message along to at the bar didn't believe me. Anyways, I played social secretary for her that night, finding out her favourite beer and fetching her when some of the regulars didn't believe me when I told them she was straight. If you see pictures of the volunteers on the web, you'll see why CENSORED had so many fans. I also asked the cute bartender chick if she was straight, because several people had asked me to ask. She's played both sides, but don't let that get back to her bosses. Just after
last call I got everyone's attention and made a somewhat drunken toast to everyone there and the fun we were having. They finally got us kicked out of the bar and some of us hung out at the lobby for another hour or so. Congrats to Laurie for getting her groove on with another attendee in the lobby bathroom.

Sunday
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I didn't have to work the brunch, but thankfully managed to snag some leftover sausage and waffles. I found out CENSORED. Renee's photo ops line was huge! I'm told she was wearing her angel costume, I'm still not
entirely sure how that works with her obvious pregnancy since I didn't see her, but apparently it did.

Victoria Pratt and TJ Scott came on and they were quite funny. She really played up a couple things, like some people at the party "devirginating" TJ since he'd never done a convention before. They talked about how they met, and how she originally thought he was "cute, but too bad he's gay." TJ spoke
on how he was asked to do the pilot for Cleopatra 2525, but he turned it down to spend time with Victoria, but then she got the part of Sarge and he still didn't get to spend time with her. They talked about her hobbies
and he bemoaned them. Apparently she's a gameboy, sudoku, and wolleyball fanatic(the w is not a typo). They also mentioned how he enjoyed throwing her off a 4 story building for Mutant X a little too much.

Lucy came on to a standing ovation. Her parents were there and CENSORED. Lucy was wearing a multi-colored spotted dress I'm sure I've seen her wear before and very chic red boots. Some guys from G4's "Attack of the Show" were there and CENSORED. CENSORED in the front row perverted just about everything Lucy said and Lucy started calling her Potty Mouth and Potty Brain. She talked about a wide variety of things and said what she missed
most now the show is over is Renee. She found out she had just missed Renee finishing photo ops that day and was a little saddened. She thought it would have been cool to have a picture from the photo op with Renee and an
attendee yelled back "70 dollars!" (the price of the photo op). Everyone cracked up at that. I'm afraid I don't remember much about Lucy's panel after that because CENSORED. Throughout the day before Lucy came on
CENSORED getting in really close to me(really close) and asking me if CENSORED. CENSORED. During the panel, CENSORED and again got far too close and CENSORED. Thankfully CENSORED. We finally CENSORED just at the end of Lucy's panel and we got to pay attention while she performed one of her songs. She's got a really good voice, and she even, somewhat jokingly,
mimicked the slide guitar parts in the song. I'm sure, CENSORED, someone made a recording of it and you'll be able to find it on the web in a couple days. CENSORED.

Then Hudson Leick came on and told everyone she was incredible loopy from Sudafed. She was dressed like a sexy goth chick in a vinyl black full length jacket and a skin tight long red lizard print dress with a lace up back. She kept stroking her stomach and wiggling on stage. (Her panel was incredibly disjointed so I'm sure I'll get the order of things messed up) When asked, she said that she had bitten a couple people that weekend. She got a real kick out of seeing herself on the big screen behind her and wiggled her butt at herself before someone used the camera angle to mimic
grabbing her butt. She also thought the tops of people's heads that she saw on the screen were rocks. I missed a little bit after that CENSORED. Anyways I got back and Hudson was talking about having an alien baby and licking all the birth goo off of it and someone said they'd still kiss her. She called them a freak because they'd kiss someone with alien baby birth goo on their face. She talked about her father settling in to watch her on the episode of CSI she did and turning it on to see her "crawling in her skivies on some man" and then he switched back to the football game because he'd just seen more of his daughter than he ever wanted to. She wanted to
pet everyone's heads and an attendee yelled out "There's only CENSORED of us!"* She dragged her new boyfriend on the stage, he'd been CENSORED, but she liked him because he would say "No, Hudson." Anyways, she kept him up there and talked about how she kept trying to get his attention in acting class because she had a crush on him. She had him answering questions for a while and attendees asked him: "what are your intentions towards our
Hudson", "can you keep her in the style to which she's become accustomed", and other things a new boyfriend would expect to hear from a girl's parents. They spoke about their rule of threes. She can insult him three
times before she earns a tickle torture punishment. She racked up a lot of threes while she was on stage. She talked about the time when he finally noticed her because she got in a knockdown dragout fight with their acting teacher and walked her to her car because it wasn't a safe part of town. She called him an idiot and said she had a crush on him. His response was "Well, you're cool. And you're pretty. And you're cool." And she slammed on the gas and drove away because she was "many things!!! But, 'cool' and 'pretty'?!?!?" And she called him a moron, which got her The first three of the night. He made a few silly faces and she finally let him off the stage. More wiggling and stomach stroking ensued, followed by fun with the big screen. She talked about how stupid you are
and how great you think you are when you're drunk and proceeded to demonstrate including throwing herself to the ground. And she kept
blaming the Sudafed. To finish her panel she brought some scholarship people on stage and talked about the scholarship a little and then
auctioned off her outfit. The first and only bid was by CENSORED who immediately shouted $2000.

Then I was back to CENSORED(more so I could sit down than anything) and CENSORED came back and CENSORED and then she made an incredibly insulting comment mindlessly and I finally made a snippy comment back about her being too young for ... something I was trying to ignore her so I don't really remember. CENSORED. One of the other attendees CENSORED. Thank you to whomever that was, I owe you a drink, and your comment about CENSORED is very true.

Hudson's photo ops finished very quickly and CENSORED. CENSORED for Hudson's autograph and CENSORED. One of the other volunteers CENSORED, and I explained CENSORED.

Then it was time for me to get ready to catch my flight home so I turned CENSORED and said bye to everyone I could find. Then CENSORED. Anyways, the whole weekend was very fun and very exhausting. I got maybe 7 hours of sleep during the con and I lost 5 pounds. But, it was more than worth it.

*Apparently someone else can do 2nd grade math

quote:

Finally we made it to the dessert party and I CENSORED Tim Thomerson's CENSORED.

heh