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Chief Chesty Forlock  |
OK, you obviously want some big throw down about whatever is bothering you because you KEEP coming back to Satachrist's thread, despite threatening to leave. I used to really like you, Nanzar. I thought of you as a good mate. I loved reading your poetry, and when other people used to complain to me about some of your more fanatical religious views I would defend your right to speak them. You took it upon yourself to publish a private email sent to you on behalf of Amethyst and me, to try to humiliate me in front of the rest of the Scrolls. That backfired with most people seeing it for the petty-minded piece of grubbiness that it was. You isolated yourself from a lot of other Scrollers by doing that. When I told you how hurt I was by that action you showed no intention of trying to address my feelings. Instead you kept harping on and on about how 'right' you were in Private Messages to me, as though I had deliberately tried to hurt you somehow. I told you I would no longer stick up for you, I told you that you were now on your own. You didn't seem to care. You've made your bed and I see that you are uncomfortable lying in it. I'm not one to ignore you forever, but I now find it difficult to talk to you. Your current outburst doesn't make things any easier. If you don't like the Scrolls do something to change them. They are only as strong or weak as the people who contribute to them. Your name has rarely appeared in the list of top five posters that comes out each month so exactly what it is that you are contributing? It's not anybody's responsibility to entertain you in this place. If you don't like it here, piss off. However, I invite you to stick around and grow up. |
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Scroll Obsessive |
Agreing with Argy here. I liked you to. I enjoyed reading your post, even though I don't always agree with what you say. You have a way with words, Nanzar. I'll also add that I think I missed some of what Argy here tells. But this latest outburst in Satachrist thread, it doesn't look good. Really. Why did you post it there? Made no sense at all to me. You should have posted it here instead, and I with other Scrollers could have read it and answered it, and it could have been a civilized dicussion. Don't you agree?
Oh well. I hope you won't leave Nanzar. Deal with it instead. |
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Scroll Guardian  |
[i]Main Entry: 1mar·tyr Pronunciation: 'mär-t&r Function: noun Etymology: Middle English, from Old English, from Late Latin, from Greek martyr-, martys, literally, witness 1 : a person who voluntarily suffers death as the penalty of witnessing to and refusing to renounce a religion 2 : a person who sacrifices something of great value and especially life itself for the sake of principle 3 : VICTIM; especially : a great or constant sufferer by your own admission you set yourself up to be shot down. then you can point your finger and go, "see! see! you shot me down!! i knew you would!!!" very endearing, that... WHAT WOULD XENA DO?  are you sitting on the soap? sometimes, you just have to say 'what the f...' |
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Expert Scroller |
Nanzar
Ok let's talk. I was going to address this in Sata's thread but you know, it really isn't the place. I think you've needed to deal with these issues for some time. I'm glad you made an effort to at least voice them...the trouble is, your'e so angry it comes off all biting and condemming. I hear where both you and Argy are coming from with regard to the RACE, but you and her need to really sort it with no more accusations. Taking a trip to memory lane, posting that email wasn't nice, anymore than me screaming and yelling at Sara and Argy and Ame wasn't nice eitiher...you said at the time that i was backing down, being intimidated by the "in crowd." Nothing can be further from the truth but the way i handled it sucked balls. Sara is my friend. I shoudl have known better than to lose my rag and blast her in public like she was my enemy. Same with Argy. She and i are friends too, i should have been mature enough to deal with it one on one, privately. Same with you. You shoudl have known better than to blast Argy and Ame in public like they were out to get you...that's what the Race did to a lot of us unfortunatly. We got entirely too caught up in our charactars and forgot, that we were working with FRIENDS. I myself broke my own rule of performer etiquette that i try to stick to. It's only fuckin make believe lol. Sounds simple, doesn't it? Guess what, it's NOT. As a singing actress i know from experience, hard as it was to stick to it in the RACE....people who you know who are playing a charactar...they are not being their damn selves. Sara's goat scene(which i now know was Nora's idea anyway) was not meant to hurt me, kate, for any reason, anymore than people's reactions to you as Eli were meant to target you, Nanzar in a mean way--for any reason. There just happens to be a lot of fabulous actors and writers here at the scrolls, including Sara and Zoom and Ame and Argy. That was my first ever role playing game, and it taught me a lot. honor the fuckin make believe, don't take it seriously. Sara, my friend in real life, was as Livia the big badass of rome, she and Minya and Cupid were on opposite spectrums. That's how it worked out, end of story. But it's only a damn game lol. That's what i eventually had to tell myself to deal with all the crap that came up. People took a lot of things personally in that game and tempers went out to lunch and misunderstandings went all over the place. AS for you, tho, Nanzar, Eli may have been an extension of yourself, to a degree mainly cuz of your faith. It worked out that way. He gave you an opportunity to celebrate your faith and your relationship with God, and your work with me was a good way of helping someone out, helping Minya get grounded and centered. I loved our work together, Nanzar, and we didn't even talk about it one on one. We just did it. It was excellent syncronicity. As to what you said about the scrolls in general...I disagree that it's a "politically correct" kind of place where people don't speak their mind anymore. I personally just love it that there's not all this biting, snippy shit in fight club every other day. Well aside from this thing but there is an attempt made to discuss it at least, not just blast each other. The old scrolls got so negative and tiresome after awhile cuz of that...i just got fed up and left. End of story. I stuck around here because it's really a more peaceful place. Disagreements happen, we're only human, but we resolve them and get to the other side. I think what's happening is, you need to do that. I hope you do. I hope you don't jsut leave in a sulk. Work it out with Argeaux. Work it out with everyone you need to. Feel free to pm me too if you want to talk as well. Take care Kate  "...They're the worst sort of Muggles! They--" "They're the only family he's got." Hi I'm Kate(wp9), and I am a compulsive Handle and Sig Changer.  "Like a Bat out of Hell I'll be gone when the morning comes When the day goes by and the sun goes down And the moonlight's shining through.... Then like a sinner before the Gates of Heaven, I'll come crawling home back to you!" |
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Scroll Guardian  |
First off, Kate, extremely wise words my friend. You got it in one there.
 I think I may have needed to hear a bit of that too. Thanks. You're awesome. Nanzar, there's never a middle ground for us. We're either tolerating each other or at each other's throats, it seems. Your attitude irks me, in that it's exactly as zoom said, like you're a martyr. Which isn't something that's needed around here. No one needs for you to "suffer through the persecution" of posting on the Scrolls. And to be honest, I seriously doubt many people "have it out for you". I have a live and let live attitude. You stay away from me, or at least be civil to me, and I can do the same. Your post after mine in Satachrist's welcome thread was both childish and just plain petty. I think Kate is right, you're so angry it's just coming off as bitter and childish and selfish. If you feel you've been wronged, you need to say so. No one can fix something if they don't know what's broken. It's funny though, you say you're mistreated and the like, but you've mistreated others. It appears you never tried to apologize to Argy, yet you want restitution made? That's bullshit. The Scrolls has never been a place where anyone's faith has been something to be poked at, made fun of, etc. You don't have to scream "I'm a Christian" to be one. So don't even try to pull that crap either. You got a beef, air it, otherwise it'll just fester and tear you apart from the inside, which is what it seems to be doing now. I don't wish any harm upon you, I never have. Do yourself a favor and deal with this shit now, otherwise it'll just be worse for you in the long run. ____________________________  I <3 4 foot 11, blonde, operatic wonders from Oklahoma. |
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Ultimate Scroller |
Nanzar,
Usually I don't get involved in this type of crap, but I must admit there are things that irk me about what you've said in Sata's thread. One of the things that bothers me the most is the way that you throw around the idea of that people are on your back about your faith. I'm sorry, but that's not the case at all. I feel like I can say this with a good amount of authority, because I am a Christian as well and pretty well known as one on these Scrolls. I don't hide it, but I also don't abuse it. You'll see me post poems about my faith -- people choose to say something in response or not. It's my way of "sharing" but I'm not forcing it on them in any way. One thing you'll never see me do though is get in someone's face about it. I honestly don't think a lot of people had problems with the way you went about proclaiming your faith until you were in the Race and did what you did with Eli. Quite frankly, I didn't like seeing what you did with him, because I have to agree that Eli is NOT Jesus. The Xena writers made that very clear. He was a prophet, yes. A teacher, yes. But not Jesus. And in my honest opinion, protraying him as such in a story is a bit like blasphemy. I took offense to your protrayal of Eli AS a Christian. Maybe that will mean something to you as opposed to the "non-Christians" you are defending your faith to on this board. And don't whine that people on your case right now. I don't want to hear it, because you brought this on yourself by posting what you did in a place where it was NOT welcomed. And now, you're getting what you wanted...so like others have said, deal with it. I really did like you, Nanzar. But lately, you really are stepping on a lot of people's toes...and not in a good way. It's time to get over it and play nice. ~Gabber "Fear and desperation have their day At least until faith steps up to say I believe - though God is out of sight He's working in the middle of all things Evil may have its time in the spotlight But love is waiting in the wings Love is always waiting in the wings..." |
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Dream Scroller |
Hey Everybody!
It's so nice of you to give me my own thread, in fight club no less! I don't come here often, I just don't believe that it's necessary to use swear words to have a good discussion. I also believe that it is like assault to swear at people or about things; it messes up things in the spirit world IMO. So...thanks for not doing that here. That said, I will try to reply to some of what has been said here. Argy- you made that point long ago and I thought that we had cleared that up. I publicly told you I was sorry for posting your PM to me. I don't know what more you could want. Although I wish I could take it back, I don't feel I deserve to be punished ad infinitum for it. At the time I was very hurt by the way Eli and Minya were killed off. My friends and family were following the story. I didn’t expect it to turn x- rated like that. All of a sudden something that I was enjoying slammed me into the dirt. It was a little hard to get up and be sensible after that. And no one has ever apologized for that. I know you all like to say it was just a story it wasn't real and I took my character too personally. But I don't believe you would have done the same to one of your good buddies. WP9- I'll always remember how well we interacted during the race too. I think you are a great person. You have never pre-judged me, and for that I thank you. If you did something you are sorry for because of my reactions to the goat story I'm sorry for that. I didn't intend to drag your good reputation down. eyezoom- I kind of like the definition of martyr. I didn't see where it said those people set themselves up for failure, it sounded more like they stand up for their beliefs no matter what the consequences. I'd like to be able to say that I do that. As for my comments to Satachrist- I was just giving my opinion about what this board is like lately. It's pretty much just fluff lately IMO and not like what it used to be. Sata was always a good foil for my ideas. He was a "fair fighter" and I enjoyed our discussions about religion and other things we didn’t see eye to eye on. I was just letting him know that not much of that goes on around here anymore. But in retrospect, I see that my issues with all of you came through in what I said to him. Unfortunately, I've been boiling with this for a while and I haven't had any way to let it out. So I'm really fine. I hope you all are too. Obviously you (most of you) really don't like me and there isn't anything I can do about that. I've been around a long time though, and I keep coming back because I do like most of you and I care about what happens to you. I do it, knowing that no one here really knows me or cares to know me at all. Isn't that stupid? Reflections- I just wanted to say that there have been a few rare moments when my threads or comments have been responded to. When I put up pictures from Florida many of you made comments. So I remember that, and thank you again. Some of my poems have been remarked upon as well since January. Thanks for that. Basically this board just doesn't give me what I need, or inspire me to get involved. Instead, I just wind up with buried hurts and anxiety. Perhaps you are right Argy- If that's the bed I'm making, I must be really dumb to keep getting in it! Sara and Gabber I wrote the above before reading your comments. I'll just say that I don't think my beliefs are an ongoing problem around here. I don't ever talk about Christianity anymore if you haven't noticed, but people have already made up their minds about me and believe that everything I say and do is coming from that place. Eli was NOT Jesus and I know that. I watched every episode concerning him before writing his part. (If fact it was kind of interesting that TPTB never used Jesus even though they used many other well know gods and prophets.) I simply took from what that character said and built on it, using at times my knowledge of the Bible and prophecy to explain things about him that had gone unexplained in the show. I even made him a son of Zeus in a past life. I guess you didn't know that otherwise you wouldn't claim that I was making him Jesus. But I did have some ideas in my head about goodness and love that made the game an interesting challenge. Eli tried to live by that but I found that without some kind of foundational belief in an everlasting covenant it just doesn't work. That's what I learned from being Eli, but it wasn't meant to be an affront to anyone with their own faith in what-ever. It was just what it was. A game. Now everyone, go on doing what you were doing... The crash is over, in fact it's almost all cleaned up now. |
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Chief Chesty Forlock |
If you could point me to the public thread where you did that, I would be much obliged. I can neither remember you doing that, nor can I find the thread. I still, to this day, can't figure out why you have never spoken with Amethyst, who wrote the 'x-rated material', about your concerns. Now, let me see if I can get this straight. You DON'T like the Scrolls because they are too 'politically correct' but you also DON'T like adult scenes in fictional stories (to call what was written 'x-rated' is melodramatic in the extreme). I'm confused. It seems the only type of thing you DO like is stuff sanctioned by you. Maybe you should post a list of stuff that you feel is appropriate for the Scrolls. Then other people could add what they think is OK. Then we could collate all the material and ... hang on, isn't that what we already DID when the Scroll rules were put together in 2000? What was posted in the RACE thread broke NO. SCROLL. RULES. I say again, if the Scrolls seem like they are full of fluff, what have YOU done to address that? The Scrolls will only ever be as good as the Scrollers who contribute. There is still a lot of good stuff to talk about in this place. Even YOU think that. Shawn put up a thread where people could discuss what they believe, which you said "is by far the most intelligent and enlightening thread we've ever had at the Scrolls". Let's be quite clear, though, this message board was set up to talk about the show Xena: Warrior Princess. It should really have stopped functioning years ago, when the show finished. It is bound to run out of steam sooner or later and it's natural that it won't suit everybody as time goes on. To me this place has never been about the topics, however. It's been about the people. People like you that drew me back to the Scrolls time and time again when others made me want to leave. I still find interesting, fun and kind people here, so I'll be staying. ~~~~~~~~~~  |
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Ultimate Scroller |
Nanzar,
First of all, I will say I don't know how much I like the fact that you basically came into Sata's thread attacking...and are now trying to back off like everything's fine and dandy on your end. I'm sorry, but the first reply you did (listed above) as well as the ones that followed were anything but fine and dandy. Just because people are actually addressing your concerns now shouldn't mean you back off. You opened this can of worms, quite frankly, and we're discussing and addressing it. Just...don't act like you're all fine and dandy when it's obvious by posts made yesterday that you were anything but that. Secondly, I will say that I don't like the comment about how people rarely reply to your threads or comments anymore. That's crap, quite frankly. I have always made it a point to reply to your poems -- not because I feel sorry for you or something like that, but because I actually enjoy your poetry and I enjoy the thoughts you contribute with that. Maybe I haven't done so in the last month or so, but if you look, you'd see that I haven't replied to ANYONE. It's not a you thing. It's a hey Keri's kinda busy thing. Thirdly... yes, Eli was killed off in an...interesting manner. I'll be honest and say I encouraged Shelley to post it 'cause I thought it was pretty funny -- in general. Guess she figured if she offended me, then most likely it wouldn't be a good idea to run with it... but it didn't. The truth of the matter is that it seems you don't remember that Shelley went and did the same exact thing to her OWN character near the end of the story. Zeus died by almost the same manner (if not the exact same if I remember right). I believe this was her way of showing that it was all tongue in cheek...a joke. Just like Sara's goat was a joke. (Maybe a bad joke, but a joke nonetheless.) Just like SO many things DONE to those characters when they died was a joke. They always tried to come up with interesting, different ways to kill off a character. They never failed in that respect. A lot of this story needed to be taken with a grain of salt. BECAUSE it was not taken with a grain of salt, it was taken to the extreme. Complain about something, you're bound to get something worse to show what you were complaining about wasn't all that bad in the first place. As for how Eli was protrayed...interesting... but at the same time you mention that you drew upon your knowledge of the Bible and prophecy to "fill in the blanks" of his backstory. Isn't that essentially almost the same thing? Plus, what does it matter if you made Eli the son of Zeus in a "past life", that doesn't mean he was the son of Zeus in that life. I don't believe I follow. Lastly... you say this now...
And yet, you said the EXACT opposite when you were ranting in Sata's thread...right here in fact:
I don't appreciate the change of mind when I've addressed it BECAUSE of what you yourself said. I wasn't pulling it out of my butt by any means. It was something you yourself said, as referenced above. If that's how you truly feel, then maybe you should say so and let us address it. If it's not, then stop using it as an excuse to rant. ~Gabber "Fear and desperation have their day At least until faith steps up to say I believe - though God is out of sight He's working in the middle of all things Evil may have its time in the spotlight But love is waiting in the wings Love is always waiting in the wings..." |
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Scroll Guardian |
Now if you'll excuse us, I'm going to go and try to calm my girlfriend down now. Sheesh, talk about role reversal, usually it's the other way around.
Yikes.  ____________________________ I <3 4 foot 11, blonde, operatic wonders from Oklahoma. |
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Expert Scroller |
Nanzar, I don't need to be a shrink to know that you are SO not over this. All that dripping sarcasm, right down to what you said about my "good reputation." I just want you to know that underneath it all i think you're a great person too but you really need to address this for real. Just a suggestion, take it or leave it.
I don't think anyone here has a reputation lol we are what we are. Some of these people i've known since the old scrolls. We hung out together in real life, some of us. It's not about maintaining a reputation lol.  I hear you that you were offended by Minya and Eli's deaths...like some were offended by my threesomes and i was offended by the bestiality...when i look back now i jsut say hey look this isn't about morals or any such, it's life, i mean no one took me to task for my threesomes until i screamed about the bestiality(which ok technincally can or cannot be called bestiality, the girl only kissed the goats lips lol, I don't know if that is pre bestiality or not but i don't care), and what was the point? Sara did write an excellent scene, so good it pissed me off which was a good enough affect, but why get all personal about it? I dunno the more i think about it, i may not have liked it but for fuck's sake it's the scrolls it's not prime time tv. And i don't even think Ame wrote an X rated scene. There was no mention of body parts. I don't think she did anymore than i did with Minya's diary. Anyway...i hope you sort this out with these people. I hate to see the scrolls at war. Bleeh. Oh well. Sara you're awesome too, girl. Now go and take care of your girl. I'll take care of my man and watch a movie now. I think my work is done here.Take care, all! Kate This message has been edited. Last edited by: Dumbledore's Army, "...They're the worst sort of Muggles! They--" "They're the only family he's got." Hi I'm Kate(wp9), and I am a compulsive Handle and Sig Changer. "Like a Bat out of Hell I'll be gone when the morning comes When the day goes by and the sun goes down And the moonlight's shining through.... Then like a sinner before the Gates of Heaven, I'll come crawling home back to you!" |
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Also, i would have been willing to apologise to Nanzar's friends and family who were following the story.. if i known they had been.
A simple... my mum is enjoying her daily read of this piece of scroll fiction. But i thought only scrollers were reading. as Dr eVil in austin power's says... 'i'm the boss.. need the info' And yes.. since Kate is putting her hand up for it... It was NO worse than Minya's diary..... It was no worse than what i typed for myself i feel also.. It's not like i did it to you and no one else. I would have editted this into the last reply, but since i am at work, i didn;t log in, and therefore couldn't.. so i apologise to anyone offended by TWO posts by me... than one. |
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Expert Scroller |
Rotfl you lubricate the goat i'll go lubricate the cast of Xena.
And Ame...watch out for stray arrows, don't fall on them, k? Seriously folks, Make Believe was always fun as children. It should be fun as adults too. I guess i can see where family and friends following the story could be shocked by the sex but...hey, no one knew that, like was said. And no one knew celebrities were following the story either...never mind, lol wishful thinking. Anyway onward, Autylocus is getting antsy. This message has been edited. Last edited by: Dumbledore's Army, "...They're the worst sort of Muggles! They--" "They're the only family he's got." Hi I'm Kate(wp9), and I am a compulsive Handle and Sig Changer. "Like a Bat out of Hell I'll be gone when the morning comes When the day goes by and the sun goes down And the moonlight's shining through.... Then like a sinner before the Gates of Heaven, I'll come crawling home back to you!" |
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Chief Chesty Forlock |
I'm sorry to drag your name into this thread, Ame. I had already mentioned to Nanzar in private, when the RACE was on, that she should talk to you if she had a problem with what you wrote.
I agree that it's just not fair to expect Scrollers to be responsible for the unique sensibilities of every single person who might ever happen upon this place. However, we actually are. That's why we have a Fight Club and rules for behaviour outside it. If you think those rules won't suit your family and friends you shouldn't invite them here. I have set it up so that the rules are displayed before anyone signs up for this current version of the Scrolls. If you don't like them you shouldn't agree to abide by them. You could feel like everyone is ganging up on you or something, Nanzar, but I would take heart from the fact that people are talking about these issues with you. We obviously think it's worth the time talking with you. I can see lots of things about you that are appreciated by other Scrollers, although perhaps a little more in the past than at present. Sometimes the best friendships are forged through hardship. Once again I invite you to spend some time to stick around and grow. ~~~~~~~~~~ |
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Scroll Obsessive |
Oh well. I can only repeat myself. You have to deal with this. One way or another. Note that people DO NOT want you to leave!!! That means they like you. One can like each other without agreeing on everything, you know. I don't agree with everything said here. Everyone can't agree with each other all the time. Boring world that would be.
Oh, and if you think the stuff Kate wrote in the Race, you should stay clear from mine and Argy's thread then. Just letting you know. I thought that the writings in the Race was fantastic! I didn't do much, since I am no writer, but hey! I enjoyed it nonetheless. I think most people did. The only problem with the Race it seems is that it brought out alot of bad blood between scrollers. Never fun. It shouldn't have to be that way! I hope the same thing won't happen now to. I don't understand one thing, Nanzar. If you had problem with Ame's writings, why did you talk to Argy about it? Why not go directly to the source, so to speak. |
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Chief Chesty Forlock |
I've got something else I want to ask.
Is every thing OK with your hubby at the moment, Nanzar? I hope he is alright. If he's not, is there anything we can do to help you? ~~~~~~~~~~ |
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Scroll Guardian |
you recall Satachrist as a fair-fighter. is that in implication that a sense of fair play no longer exists here? i won't belabor that question...i'm just curious. my main point in offereing Miriam Webster's (not my...) definitions of martyrdom because it seems to me, if you're making an effort toward some level of continued particiaption here and if you were truly concerned with how you are recieved, you wouldn't hold on to old petty compliants and interject them into something like a supposed welcome to a returning old-timer, offering your personal opinion as some factual description iof what the Scroll has become. face it, you don't really care about the Scrolls, or fitting in, and the pinch of how you once cared makes you just bitter enough to stay around and spit on it every so often so we all can be reminder that oh yeah, Nanzar's bitter? you miss the old debates? then start one. legitimately. don't drop a nasty barb in some inappropriate thread and get defensive when people who disagree take issue with you. it ruins the credibility of your argument, and only serves to makes the dilike you seem to think everyone has for you into a self-fulfilling prophecy. for the record, IF i were to say i didn't like you, it would have nothing to do with your faith and everything to do with the way you conduct yourself. WHAT WOULD XENA DO? are you sitting on the soap? sometimes, you just have to say 'what the f...' |
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Scroll Stalker |
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