Sigh, being in relative oblivion can get so tiresome. Thankfully Alti has come up with something of interest. So she wants to take Xena's soul? Well, there are other things that i wouldn't mind taking from Xena, but if that's what Alti wants...

To think, i was once the Emperor of Rome - no - the world! And now i'm being forced to side with the evil witch that relieved me of my destiny (not to mention my life). Gods, if i didn't need her to get me into the realm of the living, I'd have taken my vengeance on her long ago. But no matter. Her plans for Xena will keep her occupied long enough for me to get what i really want. I may not be able to materialise in the waking world yet, but i can still hear all their futile scheming. It's amazing the things you learn when you evesdrop.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Madogis,

Excellent, I have Livia believing that I'm on her side. Well, I don't think Livia really believes that anyone is on her side, but this is close enough.

Poor, twisted, soulless creature that she is. And she's not the only one. Alti, Callisto - even Ephiny was considering life on the dark side until that old fool Eli turned up and tried to straighten her out. Heh, Livia made short work of that nonsense though. I must remember to ridicule the Amazon next time I see her.

But all this anomosity in the world lately, it makes me think, "Where is the love?" Can it be that Aphrodite has abandoned the mortals to their own devices? No, she wouldn't do that - she's far too concerned about their well being. I mean, just look at what she did to me! Her own son! (She'll deny that of course.) Cast me down from Mount Olympus when i wasn't even a day old, just because I might have been a "threat" to humanity. Oooh, so I was the "evil" twin. So what!? Like that stupid brother of mine, Eros deserved to be a god over me!? Rediculous. No, if my mother hadn't stripped me of my powers at birth and sent me down to be raised as a common mortal, I would have taken Ares' place as God of War long ago. As it is, i'm having to loiter around with crazy women, scabbling for a chance to get back to my lousy human existance.

Peh, I never thought I was a god, I knew i was a god - rightfully anyway. Damn Aphrodite and her do-gooding. If only she'd come to her senses and realise that I'm the one she should have kept - not Eros. Then she could restore my godhood and oh how I'd make the mortal's squirm then. Especially you, Xena...heh heh heh

Aphrodite appeared to me today. She denied that i was her son, just as I thought she would. But then i asked myself, how did she know that i knew?? Of course! She's been reading my diary!(Sounds like the work of a nosey mother to me.) I feel so violated .

Still, she was willing to offer me a deal - if not my rightful godhood, then at least a little power to get some things done. I guess she really does love me afterall . But there is a catch. It seems Mum want's me to deliver Alti to her.(No, Julie, no - you call her "Aphrodite" until she's ready to accept you - you can't go scaring her off now!)

I can't say that it displeases me, the idea of Alti in the hands of a not-so-lovely goddess ( at Aph's new look!), but it means that my plans will have to change considerably. I'll have to leave Livia to her little temper tantrums for a while (my involvement in the reclaimation of Rome will come later), and be careful not to raise Xena's suspicions...further.

I hope Mum's okay. She just yelled at me for calling her "Aphrodite." I was only doing what I thought she wanted . It's okay *sniff*, I won't take it too personally. I think it's part of a mid-life crisis or something. She's calling herself "Dite's afro" now - wants to sound young and hip i guess. I'm also worried about her circulation. She's been looking paler every time i see her, like she's not getting enough blood to her...uh, extremities. And I think she's hearing voices o_o. She kept talking to someone called "Xenacrazed". Was she talking to me? I know I can be a little obsessive about my lo- ah...about Xena, but I wouldn't say I'm crazed.

The name, the look, the voices (o.o) - everything about the goddess of love seems to be changing. And I don't think it's going to stop there. She seems to be bored with her lot in life. She's been doing strange things with her powers, stranger than usual i mean. It's like she doesn't even want them anymore. It's like...she wants to be mortal o_o

Well Mum - ah, i mean, Dite's afro, if that's what you want, I'll be happy to take your place on Mount Olympus as the new god of love. I mean, we can't have the world going all out of balance can we? And it's not like stupid Eros is going to get off his ugly feathers to pick up the slack (stupid Eros). Yes, I think a change of lifestyle could be good for you Mum, and you know I'm always here to help

I'm a god I'm a god I'm a god I'm a god!!!! *jumping up and down in excited little circles* ^_^

...Did i hear somethig about a cocktail party on Mount Olympus o.O??

Caesar, My dear deluded one!

You are no more a god than that crazy Calisto! You came out of the underwold yes, but your powers are weak. If you continue to delude yourself you could end up worse off than you might expect.

I commend you for seeing that the head of Gabrielle was only a model. It was a good likeness made with some sophisticated new gadgets they are coming up with in Olympus. I know Dite said it was one of the three necked Gabbies (she likes to sound all cruel and mean when she doesn’t have a mean bone in her) but it was just a lie to impress Zeus!

But you can’t be serious. You actually believe that was my poor corpse lying there!

She even kew this herself at one point

quote:

---

It felt really, really good to gut the holy man. Might not have actually killed him, but it sure smarted. I shall have to remember to bring lemon juice next time. Sigh...I'm never satisfied.

---

I am already dead you foolish man. What you saw was a figment of the mind of Calisto. Beware of that one or you will begin living in her delusions yourself.


BTW- You already messed up one life. When you are ready to try to make something of this one give me a call.-Eli

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Eli,

What the HELL was that!? I think I was doing some freaky channelling thing! *Looks back over last diary entry* - I don't remeber writing any of this! Wait...Eli? He's the one that killed Ares - and Callisto killed him! Uh oh, his spirit must have come into my body and sent me into a trance. Weeeird o.o

"You're no more of a god than that crazy Callisto"

Yeah well, some of us ARE actually related to the gods, and WERE actually hand picked by Dite's Afro...

I know the god of war gig is just a temp job, but I thought i was doing pretty well for my first day . As for the way the other gods have been treating me...well...they're just getting used to me, that's all. And the whole Zeus physically throwing me out of the cocktail party, and me almost falling to my death on the slopes of Mount Olympus, and then trying to claw my way back up before I remembered that i was a god and could teleport, but decided that the party was kind of boring anyway and i'd rather stay home and read by myself thing - that was just because Zeus couldn't bear the guitl of being around me after he killed my father. That's all it was. I mean, who wouldn't want me as the resident god of war? I'm smart, I'm charming, I have an "aura". I mean what do you people want from me ?

"I'm already dead you foolish man."

Well EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE *deep breath* MEEEEEEEEEE! Zeez, how am I supposed to know these things? Eli...Eli...I do know that name. Ack! He's the one that wandering about with Gabrielle just before I had her cruci- ah, before I had her repremanded. Well i'm not sure, but I seem to recall that I kinda DIED around that time - I did't really have time to be worrying about peace, love and hippy CRAP - or the aftermath thereof. How the hell should I know what happened to that freaky beardo?? Oh wait...Dite said something about Ares killing him...hm...and if he was dead (or is - and I'll thank him to STAY OUT of my out of body transes from now on), it would have been a little hard for Callisto to "kill" him...hm...

Gods damn it! I've been under a lot of stress lately!! I saw Callisto playing with a knife, and I saw that old Guy on the ground! I just assumed!! Come to think of it, I don't think he was still there after Callisto left...bloody Livia was going crazy - I can't be expected to be paying attention to EVERYTHING!!

*cries* Oh great, well I hope everyone's happy now. *blotts tear drops off of parchment*

*sigh* Sometimes I think that no one likes me . No one ever seems willing to give me any slack. I mean, I've been having a lot of family issues lately - my father just died, I have a new job, and AND - I've had to move from the underworld to the world of the living - do you KNOW how stressful moving is!? Gods, all I need now is a wedding to plan and I'll be as crazy as Livia!!

And what is that smell? *sniffs parchment* Oh bloody hell - My whole diary smells like rose insense - well that's just great. Hey Eli - FYI - I like lavander buddy!! Next time you invade my special area (by which i mean my diary, of course o.o) you might want to lighten up on the eu de toilette!

Bloody hippies...

I should have stopped him. The gods sent Eli into my path again - let him tamper with the fate's loom, where I was going to do the same. But he got to it before I did. He cut Callisto's life line. Poor pathetic girl, she never even saw it coming.

As a warrior, and a dead one at that, I've seen some pretty senseless things in my time (both versions of it), but to go after Callisto...She would have been such a brilliant warrior for my cause, if I just could have gotten through to her.

My cause...I seem to have forgotten that of late. My beautiful Rome, how I long to see you from a guarded marble arch. I still know that Livia is the key to it all. I just need to know how to turn her.

All this stuff about Ares and Aphrodite, it's clouded my judgement. Zeus was right - I'm acting like an emotional woman - weak and easy to manipulate. Well not anymore. I tried being ruthless and void of emotion, and that got me killed - twice. I tried being caring, vulnerable, and understanding, and that got my killed again (by Hera herself, no less). So what then? At least when I was ruthless, I occasionally got what I wanted. So what do I want now...?

I want Rome. I want to be truly great. And I want Xena - one way or the other. The gods won't hand that to me on a platter, but I never had their help getting it the first time 'round.

My life, my mortality, that they can give back to me - and Zeus already has. My vengeful spirit and lust for the kill, that Aphrodite has restored. (That bitch has screwed me around one too many times. Did Zeus think it was a bother to me to kill off Auntie Dite's pet Gabby? Hardly.) And my determination, well jilted pride has a way of restoring that too (kick me off of Mount Olympus will they??). But no matter. Now I am where I wanted to be from the beginning - I am alive. Now the fun can really begin...

...ow