Before I really start ranting, I just wanna say, I dont care what your preference is, as long as your enjoying yourself. There.

Sex. That is a hot word. Depending on who your talking to, you get differnt reactions. I have gotten some really irritating reactions lately. Since my preference has changde somewhat. I have always enjoyed sex. As one should. And I have never had problems talking about it either. But I always felt like something was missing. So now I meet my b/f, the love of my life. He is like me. Has a big mouth and is not afraid of this topic. So, after alot of discussions, we started exploring the BDSM-world.

Ho, girl! you might say now, I did not wanna know that! Sorry, but I have to say it, to be able to continue.

Right. To continue.
We did not hide our new dicoverd intrest in BDSM. Why should we? We are both secure grown people. I am 26 years old and he is 30 years old. BUT! And now we are getting to the part that irritates me. Now people think I am a bad person, a slut, for enjoying this intrest. Why, I wonder, am I a bad person, becouse I enjoy ropes and whips??? The only difference in me that has happend is that I feel good and am happy about myself and my body. And that has never happend before, I can asure you!

The people that I have meet in the BDSM-community in both Borås and Gothenburg is good and friendly people, just like everybody else. So what if they dress in leather and latex now and then???!!!??? It really annoys me that there are people that say, oh I am so open to differnt opions and life-styles, BUT as long as it doesn't mean... blaha blaha.... Fuck of! If this is the opinion among the "regular people on the streets", then I prefer the people I meet in the BDSM-community. They are a much nicer and more open people.

Over and out... All done for now.

BDSM isn't my cup of tea but I figure, hey, people can do as they will as long as no one's getting hurt. Safe, sane and consensual and all that. And if people don't want to read about it, they can stop reading. There's the back button. There's the little X in the window.

My one adventure into the BDSM world was a misadventure. I found out later, on the internet, that my partner should've instructed me on safe practices instead of completely trusting me not to injure him (I didn't injure him, fortunately, but it unnerved me to find out that I could have). Maybe he was into danger or else maybe he didn't know what he was doing. I wasn't with him long, I figured I got no enjoyment out of tying people up and stuff (though I like writing about it).

I have dated interracially or have dated white men who were not American (as in from the UK, Belgium, Germany). For some folks it's a "so what?", for others it's a hot button. I tend to like my men in many flavors, a part of me is attracted to men who are not "like me" but in the end it all boils down to how we relate as humans. I used to get the "poor girl, she couldn't find anyone better" when I was going out with a Mexican man and thought, that has what to do with what? If people don't like it, fine, but it's my life, not theirs. Luckily I currently live in a city where interracial dating/marriage and multiple generations of biracial/multiracial people are the usual.

I agree with you. Nice to hear. To bad you had a bad expirence with that guy, though... That is the only danger when talking about BDSM. You really need to know your partner, or it migth turn out to be a scary and frightning expirence, and not the wonderful ones it can be. On the other hand, it is as you say, not everyones cup of tea.

But I think that everyone is more or less dominant and submissive... Just that some of us like to give full expressions to it. It might take som guts to do it, and not evryone has that much guts. And I also think that not everyone dares to show it, either.

I don't know if BDSM is different than fetishes; is it? i'm not sure what the initials mean; something Domanant Sado Masochist, I'm guessing; yah, this is kind of a naive one posting, lol!
I do know of fetishes, where people do S&M and stuff and wear latex and leather and corsets...my friend from high school has a boutique and she used to be a professional dominatrix. I don't know if she still is or not, we don't always keep in touch because she's so busy with the business. Well anywho, I do respect it, it's not my thing at all, but hey, if it makes ya feel good, do it! I actually used to work in my friend's boutique for a little while anyway. I liked to wear the corsets and the latex, they made me feel sexy even tho i was fat, lol. All sizes are appreciated in that boutique! But I didn't like some of the people who came in; they just seemed to reek negativity ya know? I met some nice people who were into it for years and they just seemed like genuinely cool beings and i respected them. But some people just were like jerks. i guess you get that all over, lol.
anyway, I wound up leaving cuz in the end, retail is just not my thing. Too many personalities and dealin with money, not always something I'm consistantly good at. I'm either really great or really terrible ya know?

Well anyway, kudos that you found something you enjoy Moonshade! Keep doin it if it makes you feel good and don't worry about any silly judgements!

Thanx for the kind words, WP9! I thought I'd start a really flaming thread here, but I guess I was wrong...

Fetish is when you are getting sexually turned on by an object of clothing or a speciall bodypart on your partner, like fots, shoes or corsetts. BDSM stands for much more, like whipping, dominating your partner, bondage and stuff like that...

BTW, I would love to visit that boutique. It is really hard finding latex and leather clothes when you are a bit bigger. So am I. You can buy stuff like that on the net, but it costs a fortune...

Anyways, thanx again.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: KSena,

bdsm? no thanks
if found the ladies (most anyways) like to be fucked gently

yeh it's a really cool boutique, Moonshade. I never used to feel very sexy being big and stuff, but when i wore those clothes, i did. It was awesome.
So whenever you're in Philly, email me, and I'll take ya there!

*grin* Sounds like a plan, WP9, sounds like a plan...

And about being sexy or not... What is it that makes a women sexy? Big tits? A big ass? The notion on what is sexy and what is not has changed alot during history. Look at 1600 or 1700 paintings, and you can talk about big and butiful women being sexy, becouse the artist found them sexy. So, beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder...

You're absolutely right, Moonshade. This silly society has all these fixations with being thin. It's ridiculous. Sometimes i get caught up in it, then i remind myself that it's silly. My husband for one loves me for who i am; he looks in swimsuit mags at string bikinis and says, "you'd look great in that."
lol, it's ironic, cuz he's so hyper about his own body being thin...that's another story, a sad one, i won't bore you with it here.
Anyway, yeh let me know when you're in town, we'll go shopping for some latex! hehe