Well this is quite the intriquing little twist...Paulina? Warrior Woman? She needs an occupation after losing Minya like that altho I must say that Minya sure knew how to live life! Went out with a bang too! Not many I know that can go out with the love poo!
but now mom and alti...hmmm. But what's THIS? Mom stepped on all my arrows? Ick not nice! Who is XC? And WP9? Sounds kind of odd, I must say. Blueberries? Well I always liked blueberries...but...
To hell with it, bleeeeh I gotta fix these arrows! grumble grumble.
anyway enough of this! i'm gonna go have some rum after all this...I need a good stiff drink!
Feel free to write in with any lurve poo questions...we all need lurve poo in our lives especially now!
Oh i fixed your arrows, Cupidity Whoopidity. Had to use that Olympian Super-glue made from Olympian psychedelic drugs. That'll add a trippy jolt! Hey, whadda I always tell you- don't leave your arrows lying on the floor!
HEHEHEHEHEH! Yeh yeh i know Mom, i mucked up i left my arrows on the floor. But can ya blame me? I mean sheesh i went into the 21st century and shot an arrow into the heart of...none other than Johnny Depp, this biker dude(not the actor guy by the same name hahahah but just as sexy)...didn't you set Minya up with him once? hehe. Well turns out he finds paradise on both sides of the fence...as i hoped he would! mmm hmm, he was nice, very nice. I was so happy, I just dropped BOTH my bow and arrows on the floor....he was just toooo cute! Well...we made sparks fly that night that's fer sher! But ok Mom I'll be good next time I promise!
Thanks for fixing my Arrows!
CupidThis message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
Found a diary...yup, now that I'm in Rome it was just lying here on the ground. CAESAR? Hmmm.....
He looked a lot like me apparently although he had dark hair...rather a handsome devil I must say, but sheesh what a grump! Crucified Xena if I remember correctly, talk about lovin and leavin a gal! Sheish!
Shame how he died...I think he really kind of wanted to find himself from this diary! He even thought he was my bro, lol well hello! We do look alike, but then he was saying....Mom told him he was my DADA's kid? ARES? Well HELLOOOOO NURSE!
So he WAS my bro! I MUST ask Mommy about this this is rather confuzzling...i had a BROTHER? DAMN! Well Dada was rather a strange one, all into the war poo even tho he did fall in love with Xena and not necessarily with my help...hmmm...ya know I think there was more of the lurve inside that ol goat than meets the eye.
Anywho, I'm off to Olympus...gotta clear this muss up! LATER GATORS!
CupidThis message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
I think Dite's Afro has pms....ick, word to the wise, never go near a goddess when the hormones are acting up! Ugh! It's worse than mortals on pms. Not fun.
Like that W dude....ick what was that about? Maybe she's a little off kilter about that silly dream she had about us all being mortals....well hey I never told her to eat that rum ambrosia whatsit thing!
THen again she always had an odd sense of humor....oh well.
Then Hera told us not to banter in certain places....cuz mortals might hear and be confuzzled. Well she's got a point there, there were lotsa mortals hangin around....don't want to give em TOO much info after all. Someone might go tell this W dude for example that the Goddess of the Lurve was tryin to break up his marriage and that i was gonna bbq him and eat him! oooops!
Anyway movin on...
I swear these Romans are passionate...just saw this married couple going after each other with meat cleavers! Can't we all just get along? Well I thwacked them both with spare arrows that I keep for mending messy marriages. Worked like a charm! THey haven't come out of their bedroom since. HEHEHEHEHEHEH!
Poor Mom, she's all grumbles about Alti, hehehehehe--I gotta admit that was a little mean on my end--but what's a god to do she was standing there with her lil ol' sexy self...not many can out-sexy lil ol'me....might as well be my mom, hehehehe. That funky Afro effectively covered Xena from Alti's eyesight too. i had to think of something or there'd be a silly passion jealousy type war between Drusilla and Alti...icky to the max!
Still...I'll think of a way to make it up to her, maybe whoosh into the 21st century again(Gotta love that crazy 21st century)--there's apparently a girl there mom kinda has her eye on...trouble is she's kind of a famous actress type...what's her name Jennifer? Connelly? mmmmm I wouldn't mind takin her myself for a roll in the hay! Anywho....
Well maybe I can't get her to agree but there's tons of look alikes out there....hmmm one of em can keep Mom busy from time to time hehehehe. MEanwhile...she can find ways of teaching Alti to bathe, and maybe that'll make even HER more appealing.
I wonder if she did get her vengence on me tho like she said....hmmmm, remember that couple I told ya about in Rome? Well...now they're having all kinds of hallucinations, both of em swearing they think they see tidal waves comin outa nowheresville...hmmm? And then they start singing some Kum Bye Yaa song....odd, really odd. What was IN that glue she used on me arrows?
Oh well, I'll have to get Bliss to fix it I suppose...he's due back today, maybe I can enlist his help! Hey...what are sons for, right?
PMS? Pretty, Mighty & Sexy? That's me!
Me thinks Jr. is trying to dodge the issue- he's hot for Dubya. Or is it the other one?
Cheney singing for & about Cupid-
"Cupid, please hear my cry
And let your arrow fly
Straight to my lover's heart for me
Now I don't mean to bother you
But I'm in distress
There's danger of me losing all of my
For I love a guy who doesn't know I exist
And this you can fix
So, Cupid, draw back your bow
And let your arrow go
Straight to my lover's heart for me!"
Aw! Cupidity Whoopidity has Bush & Dick after him!
Cupidity, check my temple soonage for an update on Alti. Me thinks you might want her for your self! But you'll owe me big if you take her.
MMMMmmmm Jen Connelly... i may be will to rid you of W & Dickless if ya work magic on Jen.
Hmmmm, a dream, mum, huh? Was your makeover of alti a dream? Hmmmmm....
Really, Mumsie, you need to see a dream analyst, babe. I think dem dere dreams are starting to cloud ya reality a bit I mean...sheesh you can't even remember your own son's taste in men, that's how cloudy you are right now
Dickless Cheneybleeh? Ehhhh think I'd rather go kiss a goat. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Errm, I'm kidding, don't get any ideas...
Not to mention that guy is ugly as sin...
And W--ick. Sowwy mums...maybe if he got a makeover and decided to take up flower basket weaving and abandoned all other silly nonsensical type things....maybe even learned to play the guitar and sing...(I rather like that kum by yaa song actually...) maybe we could talk. But otherwise....Naaaa, lil Laury sillybird can have him.
Now THIS....is MY scene!
*drool, drool...* Damn where'd the time go? I need to find my arrows....
but actually Jen connolly is HOT! Hey...leave it to me mumsy I'll see if i can lure her back wtih me...she won't be able to resist me, hehehehehe...ok I'll behave.. Just whoosh on in like you usually do and I'll thwack her...and she'll be yours. On one condition. you GET those drooling political monkeys off my back... Pweeeeeease?
p.s. Altho i will say...Alti looked HOT after that makeover(dream makeover?) Mmmm hmmm. Good work mom. If it had actually happened, it would be a HUGE improvement!
Tune in next time when you find out what happened after I opened my eyes! After those double crossing....warrior women...WOMEN! Ya can't win.This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
Mmmm, Jeremaiah's nice, I must say, perfect! Not Johnny Depp....but hey, no one is Johnny Depp after all.
Damn, I gotta stop vacationing in the 21st century or I'll start having goofy dreams like poor Mumsy.
Well Jeremaiah will keep me from that!
That was so funny, the look on Xena's face....let her try to steal my arrows again! I'll whoosh em back super fast!
Now....hmmm what am I going to do about Jen Connolly? Think I can get away with fashioning a Jenbot? Hmmmm no knowing mumsy, she's reading this right now, bleeh no gotta try to work that one out...or those fool polititians'll be panting after me for good and all!
Hmmmm wonder if I can thwack em and get em over to someone elllllse.....
*rubs his hands in glee...sees a couple of decent suspects in his mind....*
Not Xena, oh, no, she's fine the way she is....it's enough of a challenge having a lady who loves her and also wants to kill her hhheheeh.
But...there's a couple othhhhherrrrs....
OOOOO I'm a bad boy! Gotta love me!
Did Cupie have a fun day as god of garden utensils? Me, i'd never get my precious hands in the icky icky dirt. Worse than bathing with Alti.
Now be sure to wash all those nasty dirt germs outta your wings. And for goodness sake keep your arrows in the shower with you in plain sight. You want grandpa Zeus to swipe them & shoot who knows what to get who knows what with him in the hot tub?
hehehehe yeh yeh ok mom lol.
Bleeh, playing in the dirt, NOT my idea of a good time! But i must say mom, what you did with Livia back there...CLASSIC! Especially her singing "sunshine on my shoulders"...TOO priceless!
But bloody Hades! Bella now....Alti seems to have gotten SOME powers back--Grandad knows how...bleh. She shows Livia a vision of the future, somehow she removes Eyedrajit from Bella's back(whaaaaaat, flings a third chaky down and boom boom boom bleeh) and now Bella thinks she's indebted to both of them. And why? Because bloody Livia caught her and the goat together. As you would say mom...What--ever. She could take that mortal for a ride to Hades and back but because she's so confuzzled...and embarrassed...poor girl! She will do whatever Livia says. Well THAT shites me off! I mean sheesh, the least Livia could do is teach her that cool song..."Forget ya troubles come on get happy..." THAT was a CLASSIC rome speech. YES! Or that song about slapping on a happy grin...now THAT is more Alti's theme...can you SEE it mom? THe three of them taking canes and dancing with hats on some stage...ooooo THAT would totally conquer Rome...IN A DAY!
Well...in the words of an immortal mortal from the 20th century in some play whatsit thing....
"JUST YOU WAIT, HENRY HIGGINS, JUST YOU WAIT!"
HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHThis message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
Bleeh, taking no chances! That was rather scary, Jeremaiah fingering those arrows like that. Anything can happen. But i've safely hidden the arrows away and locked them up in my trusty safe...no one can get them but me...hehe not even Bliss knows the password!
That Xena...hmmmm, she got one of those arrowheads, bloody Hades....she is gonna be a problem mefinks. I'll have to keep an eye on that one...after all this is NOT the Xena who was transformed by love when meeting Gabrielle...THIS Xena has no interest in love. I'll have to watch her, and warn Mum not to be too trusting with her...sometimes she gets confuzzled, I think, believing that's the Xena she knows and loves...when guess what, it just ain't so. For all her performance at Joxer's grave. Bleeh.
Well enough of this...Jeremaiah is looking at me in a certain way and he has the bath ready...just one more protection spell...THERE. Not even Mums can open up the safe, sowwy Mom, but can't take chances, I can't afford to trust the old Xena after all.(wonder where the current Xena is? That irks me, mom and i should try to find her) Next thing, she'll be in cahoots with the Gleesome Threesome, Alti, Livia and Bella. EEK!
Wha ha HAAAAAAAAA?
BLOODY Hades! JUST when I was getting ready to relax, have a nice romantic evening. nooooo! BLISS cracks the code on me--protection spell AND passcode...clever little imp sat in on some computer whatsit classes in the 21st century(invisible of course...)! He just walked in on Jeremaiah and I in the bath(HOW rude) and waved all those arrows...and WHOOSH! Gone! OOOOOO I'll kill him I will!
And mum worries about ME being unruly. SHEESH! I'm an absolute ANGEL compared to Bliss! WHAT is that demon up to? So help me if it has anything to do with Xena....
Well, *grumbles* it looks like we have to go after him now don't we? I tried to talk Jeremaiah into staying here but then Bliss, like a fool, let it slip that Xena desecrated BOTH Eli's and Minya's grave(tact is not his strong point.)--and now he is on a rampage. What he is going to DO is BEYOND me.(sighs) WHY does mom have to go away now? Maybe one of her bloody Ditebots can help us out...bleeh, here's hoping. Or Draco. He owes me. Bloody Hades, I am NOT happy about this at all!
To top it off I can NOT get that bloody Sunshine on my Shoulders song out of my head! THANKS Livia! NOT! This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
oh now WHAAAAAAT?
Do I go after Bliss with my bloody arrows or try to work some magic to save Livia and her band?
MOMMMMM! Where are you when I need you?
All right, all is right with the world, I found my arrows. And no, Jeremaiah did not find Xena, I finally talked him out of it. Or rather the Ditebot did, after she gave us the messages from Mom. Well...seems to me I've got to keep my nose out of mortal affairs...fair enough hahaha, to be honest, mortals kind of bore me to tears anyway...all these Xenas, future Xena, past Xena, heh, will the REAL XENA PLEASE STAND UP?
Anyway, Bliss is not speaking to me, I rather annoyed him by catching him and snatching back the arrows, but he deserved it the imp. He still won't tell me what he wanted my arrows for...but oh well. Guess he'll never get em now! Just as well, imps like that need to stay away from dangerous things like this!
I got the Ditebot to help me put a fresh spell on the safe, and a brand new password, and to put a spell on Bliss that scrambles his brain every time he tries to go for them. Also she will put a spell on any goofy mortal(including Jeremaiah...can't take any chances much as I love the man) who tries the same thing. After all....can't go muckin about with Cupid's Arrows you're liable to get stuck!
HEheheheheheeheheheheh I love me, can't help it.
NOW, back to our bath!
BLOODY HADES! What the FRIG did that hag do???
Poor Jeremaiah he still can't tell me. He's petrified.
I'm gonna have to get it out of him. Bleh. Not happy about this AT ALL!
Bloody Alti. Of COURSE she would get her powers back full throttle...somehow. Still....
All right, all right, ALL RIIIIIGHT! Must not meddle in mortal affairs.
Then again theyr'e not exactly mortal....
Bleeh, ok mom, I'll behave.
He killed her. He KILLED her! I don't--believe it.
I am stupified. Jeremaiah still won't talk to me about Alti but it doesn't matter now...MOM IS DEAD??? No...it doesn't make sense. None at all.
I am burning with rage. Rage at Zeus, rage at the world in general. It's one thing to accidentally kill a couple mortals liek Minya and Eli...but to kill his own daughter...even by accident....
Oh Hades I can't handle this. This is horrible. And I'm sure Zeus feels bad as it is....I CAN not believe this has happened!
I'm sorry Mom!
That is it.
No more Mr. Nice God.
HOW did Xena get those arrows? Dammit, I HAD them locked up in the safe....
I see. It was Bliss again, messing with replacement sets. He will not be getting any bliss in the next week however....
They killed Jeremaiah. THat is not on. I'm not going to rest until he is avenged.
First Zeus kills my mother(all right, by accident) and then those two bitches kill my man. Not nice, ladies. This whole world, AND Olympus is falling apart thanks to that---XENA!
But ahhh you mistake, Cupid is not that stupid. To hell with the laws of Adonis. This time...we shall SEE who gets whose soul when it's all over.
Then again...maybe there is another way I can rectify this.
HEre's wishing me luck.
Thank the Us for Demeter.
Yes, she is good for me now, very much the mentor I need at this time. I cannot believe all this is happening....
All right, I won't cry again, that rain in Chin has NOT let up...they're not very happy about that.
What a strange day it's been. So many things happened! None of them very good...
Alti and Lucifer, huh? Well. No wonder Jeremaiah was so upset.
Love's Outrage indeed! Well...I'll see if Demeter and I can make some difference...even put some of this right. Hmmmm....there's different aspects of the lurve poo after all!
And now that Xena has all she needs...maybe that hideous past self can go back...Uncle Herc DID tell me there was some kind of potion Auntie Nim had told him about.....
Oh that will be a FINE day indeed when the REAL Xena, the one we all know and love comes back to her rightful place. She was a pain in the ass, but at least she was on the side of good. And she had SOME love in her....
Ugh. Now Bliss is knocking on my door. Crying, that lad is crying. Remorse? I think so. THen again, he did love his Granny, and I think he was starting to get used to Jeremaiah...
Bleh, better go throw him a bone.(sigh) Don't want more rain on planet Earth than necessary. Mortals always get suspicious and then Zeus and Hera get grumpy.
I guess I'll make Bliss make it up to me by ordering him to cook. Right, he can make a blueberry pie and put it on Mum's shrine...she always did love blueberries. Even if she can't enjoy it anymore...if I could cook, I would do it. But I do have some blueberry wine I swiped from some mortal's house....
Dammit. What the Hades is that 21st century song..."Now I wish it would rain down, down on me...."
Bleh. R.I.P Mom and Jeremaiah!
Bleh, well to Hades with it, rain is GOOD for the Earth.
Still have not heard from Zeus....don't know if he can bring Mom back or not, he seems to have more of an interest in that than in bringing Jeremaiah back...
Well not that that surprises me....I'm not making sense!
The only message I got from those two...was a bottle of rum left at my doorstep. Not too shabby. An extra one that they stole from Minya's room that last time. They drank all the others they stole...there was a lot of it since Minya hadn't been drinking as much as before.
It's pretty good actually, and it does kind of numb me out a little...all this crying has exhausted me so much...
As for Demeter, she rather enjoys the rum...hmmm, wonder if she'd be game to going out and trying to score us a couple of....
Comfort, after all. It's a rare thing.(sigh)
More rum, baby!*hic*This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
All right....I need to sit down. My head is spinning right off.
Freyia. Well fark me three ways blind. Unbelievable. Un--farking--believable.
Yes, I threw my arms around Mom and cried all over her, she was like "Oh, Icky mush! Tears all over this nice dress! And you're drunk, Cupid, what'd you do, drink rum with Demeter all day?"
"Well--yes," I admitted sheepishly.
"Well WHY IS THE RUM GONE?" Mom demanded angrily, hands on her hips.
It was an emotional night....poor Freyia. And now I have a task...to find out who Cara's twin was. Well at least no more Dahok....sheesh that was pretty damn good on Zeus's part, and Odin! Daaaaamn. Good work, Gods. Then again they are the Kings...
Cara. Unreal. HOW many times had Zeus bedded that demon? He loves the lurrrve well look who his descendents are! Still...EEK!
Well hey, no problem. I'll find out who that bloody twin is. As for Bella? Hmmmm. Maybe she can be...useful. Who even knows? She did have a bit of the good poo somewhere in there. Maybe I can do a little magic and bring that out of her.
Jeremaiah could have helped her too....*sigh*
No, Zeus hasn't said a word to me about bringing him back and to be honest I'm kind of hesitant to ask him again after all he's been through. And he did bring Mom back to me...well sort of. Ugh. Maybe it's for the best that I just mourn my love...and move on.(sigh)
Well AFTER I enact a bit of revenge on Livia...after all she ran him through...you didn't think I was gonna let her get AWAY with that, now did you?
But at least now our rightful Xena is in her proper place. Nice kiss, Uncle Herc! Maybe I don't need to sort him out after all...something tells me those sparks are still there...if you couldn't TASTE the lurve energy with those two...I don't know WHAT lurve energy is!
But...if they should need any help...I'm all TOO happy to oblige!
I jsut have to get my arrows back now. Should be easier now that Xena is more...reasonable.
WHAT A DAY!
I think I'm going to disguise myself as a mortal and go and swipe some rum from some place. Mom could use a drink, poor old girl. What a blow, to find out her friend Freyia is dead while disguised as her. SHe's been a bit...serious lately. THen again so have I. Not good.
DOWN WITH SERIOUSNESS! I'm going to party tonight. THen we'll have a game of soccer...with Dahok's head!
GOTTA LOVE US!This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
All right, this is heavy stuff here. Thank the Us for the rum! It's been quite an eventful day, I need to relax now.
Found Bella...poor thing, she was so confused! Wandering around the place where Dahok was beheaded, mumbling senseless nothings. "THe moon is made of green cheese," I think is one of the things she said. Makes no sense. THen something else that sounded like some kind of Eli mumbo jumbo. Anyway...
I whooshed her back to Olympus with me. Then I put a charm on her, to unscramble her brain. Once it was unscrambled, she looked at me and screamed.
"No!" she screamed. "You! You killed my mother, you bastard!"
Great Hades, she was still so confused she thought I was Zeus. Hadn't unscrambled all of it, just enough to make her stop rambling. Well we actually had to do a little battling...she has power, that one! We flew around in the air, her hitting me with everything she had. Tough little bugger! Singed my wings, too! Bitch. I HATE when people muck around with my wings.
At any rate, I finally had to douse her with that love potion I stole from Mom's supply. Well...that was interesting...I guess.
She fell in love with me. WEll fark me drunk, what do I do now?
But the good news is she went wtih it and did not fight it. THat made it easy for her to trust me.
We made love...and she told me everything. Everything. ANd then she surrendered her power over to me. Well--at least to the point where she allowed me to teach her to use it...for good.
"You're better than Eli was," she murmured in my ear.
"You did NOT make love with Eli," I said shocked.
Bella only grinned. Well, I thought. Wasn't this interesting.
Poor baby had a cry too. Well at least someone besides me was turning on the waterworks...for once. SHe finally wept about her mother's death, and Eli's...and then she sobbed about Livia...she had had her eye on her. Poor babe. She fell in love with the bitch of Rome. Ain't love a bitch indeed.
Then Dahok. Poor Bella just wailed about him. And Hope. SHe was so confused. And yet she'd been frightened, very frightened. She was mostly relieved about his death, and that made her feel ashamed, guilty. There was attraction there, unnatural attraction. ANd yes, she confessed, she'd felt that way about the goat too.
"You poor confused little girl," I said holding her and rocking her. "It's all right now, though. You're going to be all right."
"I hate them all!" Bella sobbed. "Why did my father have to--to play with my mind that way?"
"Because he's the evil Dahok, now a dead Dahok," I said holding her. "It's all right Bella."
She really went to town then. Well...Dahok had been manipulating her mind, trying to make her think certain things for so long. well that was what he did of course, he did that to Hope as well, but Hope gave into it. Bella fought it because her connection with Eli had been forged when she was a baby. For this reason, Dahok actually went into her head while she was with Joxer...and threatened to kill her right there, if she didn't take his life. So she did.
That was hard for her, admitting that. My poor wings have salt all over them now! Bloody Hades!
She really let a lot of things out, poor girl. Well...I truly hope she's all right now. I checked...Lucifer has no hold over her and neither does Alti. The hag is going on her merry way, still thinking that Bella has proven to be useless to Dahok and was punished for it. Alti had lost interest in Bella. More the better for our side!
There's no way she was tricking me either. I double checked, I even had Demeter do a once over on her. She was being real. Alti had nothing to do with our altercation.
Although I'm a little concernred about her now that she's opened up to someone. She made herself that much more vulnerable. And no, the gods are not pleased that I once again meddled in mortal affairs, but I tactfully reminded them that Bella is only half mortal. I think Zeus is a bit jealous because he always had his eye on Bella. Well she looks a lot like Minya, and in the end, Zeus couldn't resist her. Oh well. Tough booger snots!
So I am taking care of Bella. She's going to help us out, help us with the temples and the love poo. And Lucifer? No worries. She dealt with him already, whooshed him back to Hell where he belongs. Alti won't be able to reach him again, although she might THINK she is talking to him!
There's only one thing that bothers me, bothers me greatly. WHen I asked Bella if she knew anything about Cara's twin sibling, she became hysterical and started mumbling again. What is going on? Whatever is up with that? I must find out. Then again, no one will even tell me who Cara's mother is. That is irksome to say the least!
Whoever the twin is, he or she still has a hold on Bella. THAT is not on, no way! In case you're wondering, she will never replace Jeremaiah, few people can replace a great love like that even if it only lasted a week! But I am not going to let her be controlled by the dark side ever again. This girl was put here to do good. Minya and Eli meant that for her. Unfortunately they didn't live to carry that through. Well...I will have to do the work in their place. And if being her lover helps me do that...so be it.
Well at least Bella inherited her mother's taste in rum! She's an even better drinking buddy than Demeter!
Must fly!This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cupid,
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